What should you share online?
Choosing to share your life on the internet is a big decision. When I started blogging, I had to have a think about whether I'd have blogging profiles on social media to differentiate from my personal life and my 'professional' life, or whether I'd merge the two together. Initially, I separated the two, but it didn't take long for me to find that I was posting almost identical content on both profiles, often mixing the two up and decided to just have one set of profiles.
I'm what most people would call an over sharer. Earlier on I tweeted "I feel like the fact I just found a crisp packet sandwiched between my planner pages sums up how my life is going right now". Pointless, right? I share photo's of everything- if I'm out for cocktails, buying things I can't afford, celebrating an occasion or just having a games night with Alec, BJ and Carda, you'll know about it. I enjoy documenting my life and knowing that at any given point, I can easily go back to a certain photo and relive a memory, laugh about it with whoever I'm with and what not. I share my life on social media for me- but that doesn't mean it's not for you guys too. I actively invite strangers into my life knowing that it will start conversations, build new relationships with people and open new doors to me (social media has helped me with everything, hallelujah).
I love when other people over share on social media too! It means I have things to talk about with them (provided I haven't been stalking them online in a really creepy way) and I also look to certain people as inspiration too- if they're sharing all their hard work and sharing the rewards they've reaped on Instagram or Twitter, it's definitely going to inspire me to work harder!
However, over the last two years, I've come to find there is definitely a very fine line between what you should and shouldn't share online. I started off being very, very open about anything and everything- and while I still like to think I'm 100% open and honest online, I know that there are some things I will hold back on. Some of them are more obvious than others, such as my address or my phone number. Some of them are things I never stopped to consider before, for example, the names of people I'm hanging out with, or tagging that you're at a location with someone who might not want their location shared online. Some of them are personal details that I would only ever share with those closest to me, like how I really feel about the fact some guy told me I was a slag who deserved to be shot because I tweeted that Ched Evans was a rapist (hey, always gotta have a brave face on Twitter you know?) or about my sex life.
Now, I'm beginning to reconsider what I should share online again. I don't want to have to restrict my social media and prevent myself from engaging with brands and bloggers (and friends!) properly, but there have been some negative side effects to living a life online that are just becoming so stressful to deal with.
Online trolls, for example, are a nightmare. Now, I don't get them half as much as some of my favorite bloggers (Tara deals with trolls like an absolute trooper, I don't know how she does it!) and so I try to just let it go over my head. However, there is only so many times you can have insults flung at you, be told to die and various other derogatory terms simply for writing a tweet with the word "feminist" in it. It normally makes me laugh, because nine times out of ten the people tweeting you are 45 year old men holding fish in their profile pictures writing about how much they love Liverpool FC, beer and The Sun, but sometimes it can get a bit too much, you know?
The other worst case scenario is being 'stalked'. It happens far often than you might think to far more people than you might believe. For the briefest of times, I had a guy sending me money for absolutely no reason. He'd seen some of my tweets- but claimed not to have Twitter- and come across my email, which he then assumed would be my paypal details. He then used this email to contact me too. He was never nasty, he was actually nothing but nice, but it was still a little odd. I've also been stalked by people closer to home too, people who literally get so wrapped up in my life and send me weird messages, or write about me, it's actually freaky. I once knew a girl who tried to date a guy called Alex so that she could- and I quote- "Have an Alex like your Alex!". Sometimes I'll meet someone for the first time and they'll say "Oh you're the girl who..." and fill in the gap with some detail about my life that leaves me asking, how the hell did you know that? Weird, right?
Both of these scenarios are incredibly stressful, and the solution seems simple; make my social media private. However, if my social media is private, that doesn't block out the 'haters', but also the brands and businesses who find my details via social media too. Which means the only thing left to do is share less, right? It makes me sad to think that I can't share 100% of myself online but I honestly need to put my own well being first and I can't do that at the moment. For now, I'm going to be a lot less of an over sharer, just until I feel like I'm back in a good place again.
What you choose to share online is a personal choice, and I would never tell anyone what they could or couldn't share (unless it was about me, obviously). It's important that you're happy and feeling content though. At the end of the day, social media is supposed to be fun (apparently) and if it's making you feel stressed or anxious or any other kind of negative emotion you should always take a bit of a break from it! That's certainly what I'll be doing...for now!
Love from,
Florence Grace
I'm what most people would call an over sharer. Earlier on I tweeted "I feel like the fact I just found a crisp packet sandwiched between my planner pages sums up how my life is going right now". Pointless, right? I share photo's of everything- if I'm out for cocktails, buying things I can't afford, celebrating an occasion or just having a games night with Alec, BJ and Carda, you'll know about it. I enjoy documenting my life and knowing that at any given point, I can easily go back to a certain photo and relive a memory, laugh about it with whoever I'm with and what not. I share my life on social media for me- but that doesn't mean it's not for you guys too. I actively invite strangers into my life knowing that it will start conversations, build new relationships with people and open new doors to me (social media has helped me with everything, hallelujah).
I love when other people over share on social media too! It means I have things to talk about with them (provided I haven't been stalking them online in a really creepy way) and I also look to certain people as inspiration too- if they're sharing all their hard work and sharing the rewards they've reaped on Instagram or Twitter, it's definitely going to inspire me to work harder!
However, over the last two years, I've come to find there is definitely a very fine line between what you should and shouldn't share online. I started off being very, very open about anything and everything- and while I still like to think I'm 100% open and honest online, I know that there are some things I will hold back on. Some of them are more obvious than others, such as my address or my phone number. Some of them are things I never stopped to consider before, for example, the names of people I'm hanging out with, or tagging that you're at a location with someone who might not want their location shared online. Some of them are personal details that I would only ever share with those closest to me, like how I really feel about the fact some guy told me I was a slag who deserved to be shot because I tweeted that Ched Evans was a rapist (hey, always gotta have a brave face on Twitter you know?) or about my sex life.
Now, I'm beginning to reconsider what I should share online again. I don't want to have to restrict my social media and prevent myself from engaging with brands and bloggers (and friends!) properly, but there have been some negative side effects to living a life online that are just becoming so stressful to deal with.
Online trolls, for example, are a nightmare. Now, I don't get them half as much as some of my favorite bloggers (Tara deals with trolls like an absolute trooper, I don't know how she does it!) and so I try to just let it go over my head. However, there is only so many times you can have insults flung at you, be told to die and various other derogatory terms simply for writing a tweet with the word "feminist" in it. It normally makes me laugh, because nine times out of ten the people tweeting you are 45 year old men holding fish in their profile pictures writing about how much they love Liverpool FC, beer and The Sun, but sometimes it can get a bit too much, you know?
The other worst case scenario is being 'stalked'. It happens far often than you might think to far more people than you might believe. For the briefest of times, I had a guy sending me money for absolutely no reason. He'd seen some of my tweets- but claimed not to have Twitter- and come across my email, which he then assumed would be my paypal details. He then used this email to contact me too. He was never nasty, he was actually nothing but nice, but it was still a little odd. I've also been stalked by people closer to home too, people who literally get so wrapped up in my life and send me weird messages, or write about me, it's actually freaky. I once knew a girl who tried to date a guy called Alex so that she could- and I quote- "Have an Alex like your Alex!". Sometimes I'll meet someone for the first time and they'll say "Oh you're the girl who..." and fill in the gap with some detail about my life that leaves me asking, how the hell did you know that? Weird, right?
Both of these scenarios are incredibly stressful, and the solution seems simple; make my social media private. However, if my social media is private, that doesn't block out the 'haters', but also the brands and businesses who find my details via social media too. Which means the only thing left to do is share less, right? It makes me sad to think that I can't share 100% of myself online but I honestly need to put my own well being first and I can't do that at the moment. For now, I'm going to be a lot less of an over sharer, just until I feel like I'm back in a good place again.
What you choose to share online is a personal choice, and I would never tell anyone what they could or couldn't share (unless it was about me, obviously). It's important that you're happy and feeling content though. At the end of the day, social media is supposed to be fun (apparently) and if it's making you feel stressed or anxious or any other kind of negative emotion you should always take a bit of a break from it! That's certainly what I'll be doing...for now!
Love from,
Florence Grace
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